The two week rule: how to get over a tough breakup

Breakups can be terrible, and sometimes it seems like you will never be happy again. But time heals, and here are some tips to help you heal faster.

Remember sometimes it's better to leave

We live in a society where it is believed that something is wrong with a girl if she is abandoned. “You just didn't work on the relationship,” - almost certainly each of us will hear at least once after the breakup. But it's better to be alone than to live with someone who hurts you or just doesn't fit. There is no need to waste time that can be spent on finding a real one - and a mutual one! - love.

You should not analyze the past, constantly asking yourself the question: "Have I tried enough?" Better think about what red flags that say you are incompatible you have not noticed. There is nothing wrong with mistakes - they help us make better choices in the future.

Ban him on social media

Blocking is the best way to resist the temptation to spy on your ex on social media. Trust me, you don't want to see him enjoying life and going out on dates while you try to put together a puzzle from the pieces of his heart. Remove all your joint photos from your phone so you don't stumble upon them by accident. It is not necessary to delete them at all: just hide them in some folder that will not loom before your eyes. Get the pictures out of there later - if you want.

Give yourself two weeks to grieve

Feelings don't just disappear. They have to be lived through, and this takes time. You don't have to be strong and immediately after the door slammed, forget about the past. Cry, complain to your friends, watch all the seasons of The Real Housewives of New York, gorge yourself on ice cream, lie on your bed. If you don’t give yourself time to get through the pain, it will catch up with you later. Just stay with her and then move on.

Rearrange

Move furniture, buy new sofa cushions or bedding. Have you ever wanted to take two carts of scented candles, stuffed toys and stupid vases out of IKEA? It's about time! Change the space - let it be different from the one in which you lived together. Collect the things that remind you of your relationship, put them in a box, and put them under your bed. Someday they will cease to evoke emotions in you, then you will return them to their place.

Take a ride or go somewhere alone

When you share your leisure time with someone, you have to constantly take into account his opinion and make a compromise. Be selfish who only does what she likes. No more: "I don't want to watch Black Widow, let's go see The Cobra Toss!" Choose a movie to your liking, dine at a restaurant yourself, go on vacation alone. You will be surprised how much better this is than adjusting to the other person all the time.

Chat

In fact, you are not missing a person, but the warmth that he gave. Supporting words, messages "How are you?" in the messenger, sincere interest in what happened to you during the day. But this can be given not only by a man, but also by loved ones. Without all these small, but such important signs of attention, it might seem that no one cares about you. But this is not so: only one person has disappeared from your life. All the others stayed close.

Go on a date

But don't rush yourself. There is no recipe that will help you accurately measure the time in which you will forget your ex. A few days, a week, a month - decide for yourself how many you need before diving into Tinder again. There are people who are ready to do it right away - and there is nothing wrong with that. There are those who need to wait longer - and this is also completely normal. Just don't look for anything serious until you realize that your soul is completely healed and you no longer think about ex all day long.

Write him a letter, but don't send

Sometimes the relationship ends, and you still keep thinking about what you should have said to this person. Write an email with all the words that seem important to you and save it in drafts. Mention all the bad things that happened between you. And when you feel lonely and want to talk to your ex again, open this letter and remember why you broke up.

It's easy to extol relationships and remember only good things, especially in times of weakness. But do not forget about the negative - this is the only way you can avoid falling into it again. It is worth having a cheat sheet that will tell you why you should not call him at night in an attempt to return to the starting point.

And never forget: love for life is a myth. There will be new relationships - and certainly no worse than those that ended.