It's not about your diligence, smart budgeting, or financial literacy. It's in your head.
The majority, I am sure, believe that it is primarily the origin of a poor family that prevents a woman from becoming a rich woman. Even more often I come across the conviction that the lack of "blat" and useful connections prevents me from achieving financial well-being. Both statements are wrong.
There is no direct relationship between happiness and the amount of money. It only occurs in the case of serious health problems. Everything else is a state of mind. With a healthy psyche, a person needs as much money as he can eat.
I'll start a little from afar. During perestroika, the issue of school uniforms was actively discussed in schools. Say, if you give children the opportunity to dress out of shape, the difference between rich and poor will immediately become obvious. Moreover, teachers who wanted the most even and conflict-free team in the classroom were more often on the side of the “equalization”. It was believed that the obvious difference in material status will lead to the fact that children from wealthy families will bully children from low-income families. I then worked at a school, was a young teacher and practically the only one who argued the opposite. Children from poor families, looking at better-off peers, will receive additional motivation in the future to change their material status, earn more, strive for achievements, career and success.
It is from the poor that the rich are made. These are statistics. In Russia, we do not have so-called Old Money, fortunes that would have been formed by generations and passed on by inheritance. That is, all the rich we see today are people who left the USSR, just like those who are poor today. The starting conditions were approximately equal, but some "fired", while others did not.
The first symptom of "innate poverty" is anxiety and fear that money will run out. If you have ever caught yourself thinking "What will we eat if". There is such a wonderful poem that all fans of the film "Kin-dza-dza" know:
Mom, mom, what are we going to do when the winter cold comes? I don’t have a warm scarf, I don’t have a winter coat!
This is just an example of the psychology of poverty. Postponing for a rainy day, deliberate accumulation (this is putting money into a conditional piggy bank, not because they remained unspent, but the regular "cutting" of some amounts from the budget), calculating expenses (this is to pay bills, this is for movies and ice cream), all it creates poverty. This is a sign of a flawed consciousness, the consciousness of a poor man. And, unfortunately, the overwhelming majority of people in our country live this way: they save, save, limit themselves in everything. By saving money, you are taking it away from yourself and from your fulfilling life today. You serve your fears and reinforce the mentality of a beggar.
For comparison: there is such a thing as "French ideology". The French are not the richest nation in the world, and France is by no means a leader in the global economy. And salaries in France are not exorbitant, and life is quite expensive. So, the most unsecured French woman who buys clothes in the TaTi department store (the lowest price level, then only second-hand) will buy herself a handbag, shoes or a scarf, which will cost cosmic money for her. But he will buy. For the last money. Because she wants to, because it will delight her, because it is beautiful. "Live as if today is the last day and in the end you won't be wrong." This is the psychology of the joy of spending money. Do you understand? There is a connection "money - joy". And in our minds "money - anxiety, problems, shortage." You can't get hung up on money, you can't pin all your hopes on it. A fairly typical path to a dead end in life is to live and think that now this is just a rehearsal of life for you. And, they say, tomorrow you will move to another apartment and change into a luxurious car and then you will really heal!
We must live for today. If you are always dissatisfied with what you have, and you do not have a full-fledged TODAY, where does a full-fledged tomorrow come from?
A person with the psychology of a poor man puts off his life for later, he dreams that one day the same, happy and secure life will come. But if you save (even money, even pleasure, even life), it will never come.
Another trait of a psychologically poor person is that he is pathologically unsure of his ability to earn. At the interview, such girls say with all their might that it is an honor for them to be invited to a meeting, that they dream of getting to work in a company. They don't see this interview as a meeting of equals: the company is looking for an employee, and the employee is looking for a company. They initially take the position "from below", the position of a little person. So we, as they say, will not sell the elephant.
What to do? Start by building confidence in your professional skills. Each will surely name a few skills or abilities in which she is good. Be proud of it. Yes, there are many things you don’t know and do not know how, but you are able to quickly learn! You are able to learn new things, gain experience, you deserve high positions and high income. You are morally ready to spend this money on what you like, and not to store it in fear that tomorrow everything will be taken away. Because if it is taken away, then all your efforts will go to waste. If you spend this money here and now, you will at least live in joy.
Forget the phrase "Market situation". Yes, there are people who compare their income with the "hospital average" and are guided by the fact that they will earn about as much as they offer to other people with similar qualifications. But this is nonsense.
Let's go further. Rich people are not afraid to live on debt. They are sure that this debt is temporary, and they calmly give it back as soon as they receive their next income. And that this income will be - they have no doubt. They will find an investor, a sponsor, bring two businessmen together and receive a commission for services, change their pricing policy, and offer their services to more successful production. They have a free thinking, broad, and know that if one method does not work, the other will work. They are not afraid to take risks and seek, this is their passion, their adrenaline.
Here's a real story: a girl dreamed of a beautiful car. I saw an ad for the sale of a fuchsia car that exactly matched the color of her favorite gloves. I thought it was a sign from above, collected money from friends, colleagues and acquaintances, and bought this car. The day after the purchase, we drove into the girl at an intersection, two doors for replacement. She did not have time to get insurance. The guilt was recognized as mutual, compensation was not due to her. What did she do? I went to collect money again! I fixed the car on them. And what do you think? A month later, she found a new job with a higher salary, after two she made a profitable deal and received a bonus from the management, and after three months she completely paid off her debts for both the car and the repairs. And six months later I went to rest abroad. Because she believed in herself, that she would earn money, that financial difficulties were temporary, and she wanted a car right now. I am almost sure that if she had not bought this car, she would not have started looking for a new job, and, accordingly, would not have increased her income. Debt stimulates, pushes forward, rich people are not afraid of them.
Another sign of a potentially wealthy person is that he is not afraid to work for himself. Almost everyone starts with a job, but as soon as a person realizes that he has gained enough experience, he goes into free swimming. Because even the salary of a top manager is just the amount that is paid to him by someone who actually has a lot of money. The salary is relaxing. You understand that on the 1st and 15th you will get this much. You will definitely have enough for this and that. Self-employment assumes that you are responsible for whether you will have bread tomorrow. Or bread and butter, or bread with caviar. And the person striving for wealth is not afraid that it will not be enough. Not enough - take on credit, open a new project and pay off.
Another example: a potentially wealthy person boldly invests in their future. He does not go for half measures. If he opens a restaurant, it will immediately be a large and beautiful restaurant with a high-quality interior, good wines and a professional chef. This person will not start with a room with a cheap renovation, plastic chairs and a diner menu, in the hope of earning extra money from it, let alone … you see? He doesn't put off a good life for the future. At first, his restaurant will operate at a loss, then it will level out if it does not save on food and staff, and then it will become a fashionable place and make a profit. And the diner will burn out, the person will be convinced that he is a bad businessman, and will slide back into his poverty.
If a person does not build a business, but tries to avoid losses, anxiety and fear of ruin pushes him to mistakes, which sometimes turn out to be fatal.
This is why it is more difficult for women to get rich. A woman is responsible not only for herself, but also for her children. And yes, in many situations it is safer and safer for her to receive a salary 2 times a month and know that she and the children will be fed, dressed and shod. I do not condemn this approach in the least, I want to emphasize this. It just never leads to wealth. This can also be a deliberate choice, and no one has the right to consider it wrong.
It's important to understand that money doesn't like fear. Money loves the fearless.