Cosmo columnist and part-time friend of Ksenia Sobchak, Alexander Tsypkin, at our request, asked her quite provocative questions. And I got frank answers.
If you don't mind, I'll start with a primitive choice of two human qualities
I read your questions about the Matrix pill, and about the pills - it's okay. It is more difficult with a person, a lot of things are mixed in people …
Nevertheless. Imagine that you choose a friend and he has one of the two offered qualities. Clever or kind?
I initially adhere to the belief that it is more difficult for a smart person to be a scoundrel and real kindness is part of the mind. Because the mind is also the ability to understand. A smart person can change something, can reflect, can understand that he did wrong, repent and change his life. A fool will always insist on his own. Hitler, Napoleon, Caesar - after all, they were clearly not fools, but I do not think that kindness is their strong point.
The world is not divided into Hitler and Jesus? It is more important here that you always lose with a stupid person.
A loyal friend or a strong one?
Probably a devotee.
Honest or Talented?
Well, a lot of talent can be forgiven. When you see incredible, dazzling talent, it excuses a lot in a person.
Ksenia Sobchak and other stars who turned from best friends into sworn enemies
At the end of the 2000s, Tina Kandelaki and Ksenia Sobchak were the closest friends. Their passionate kiss at the Woman of the Year Awards was unforgettable! But then a cat ran between them. And he still continues to run. From time to time, Ksyusha and Tina throw mud at each other on Instagram. They do not try to avoid sharp corners - they use sarcastic phrases, sharp words and sometimes even obscene language. But the audience has long been bored with the barbs! It's time to bury the ax of war!
Will you forgive a talented person for meanness that you will not forgive a mediocre one?
What difference does it make who betrayed you: a talented person or not so much? Here we must go into some specific definitions. What is meanness? For me, meanness is a conscious evil. But for you and for me, meanness can be completely different things.
I will not forgive meanness to anyone. But for me, meanness is a set of things I have defined, and, conventionally, it is quite difficult to reach this line. I will probably close my eyes to petty meanness such as malicious gossip. In principle, I am inclined to forgive and understand people. Understand that people are weak. That is, I think it is initially wrong to expect something big from people. I am often asked: how did you survive the situation when dad stopped being the mayor, everyone left you, he was almost imprisoned, the phone did not answer. That situation taught me that nothing particularly good should be expected from a person. It will be a revelation for me if a person suddenly decides otherwise. I proceed from the outset that no one owes anything to anyone. In general, I think this is an important thing. An important principle for me is that people don't owe you anything. Nobody owes you anything. Even if the person is your friend, even your husband, even your mother or whoever. When people do good to you, you should be grateful to them and consider it a surprise and a holiday. And be glad that they decided to make your life a little happier.
And on my part, this is also always a free choice - to make the life of people around me better.
Let's talk about the criteria. Look, you told me all the time that one of the unacceptable actions for you is the relationship of your girlfriends with your ex-boyfriend. That you would never forgive this. This is a betrayal for you. But I, on the contrary, think: if people have dispersed, then they certainly do not have to reconcile their personal lives
I, like every person, have cockroaches. I do not insist that I am right. Conventionally: I'm afraid to sleep in the dark. Do I understand, being not the most stupid person, that ghosts do not exist? Understand. But when the light goes out, nothing can convince me that now someone will not grab my leg. It's the same here, although I understand that it looks idiocy.
Will you forgive this idiocy to your friend?
I have already forgiven, I had such a situation. It took several years, but now we are in touch. Not as close as it used to be.
Let's go back to talent and meanness. So - in the end - the talented person is allowed more?
No. Why? If, in my understanding, a person has committed meanness, what difference does it make whether he is talented or not? Yes, I love interesting, bright people, those who pull me up. Talk to them about what develops me. I don’t want to waste time talking about who slept with whom.
That is, you want to tell me in your blue eye that you are not gossiping …
I gossip, of course, and I really don't like myself at this moment. I try to be better and I know that these conversations are pulling me down. And I want to get better. But come on to your question: honesty or talent? Talent. But at the same time, I will not forgive meanness to either one or the other. Neither honest nor talented. But I repeat again: meanness is a deliberate evil. If someone did not help me in a difficult situation, based on personal interests, this is not meanness.
This is a weak person's choice
I do not quite agree with you here: inaction is sometimes meanness. It is inaction that leads to the 37th year.
I can’t blame a man for meanness who didn’t undertake a feat for my sake. Heroes are rare. Again, I do not expect anything from people and therefore I forgive a lot.
Good. Let's continue the blitz. If it's not about a friend, but about marriage. Loyal or Interesting?
Loyal, I guess.
Generous or bold?
Brave, I guess.
Brave. Good. We'll move on to other things soon. You caught a goldfish. She can save you from one of two events in your later life. Disease or Poverty?
The disease, of course. There is nothing worse.
Poverty or obscurity?
Poverty. I will survive the obscurity. I am terrified of poverty.
Female loneliness or professional failure?
Before the next blitz, I can't help but ask one personal question. But let it sound abstract. Do you think people should end some relationships first and then start others?
Of course, I believe that this is what we should always do, but we do not always know all the details, but we judge by the information we have. Look: there is a great example when a man walks with three children on a bus. They cry, scream, start jerking everyone around. And everyone thinks: what ill-bred children and what this man is - he doesn't even say anything to them. And then, for example, all of a sudden all these people on the bus find out that their mother died ten minutes ago or that they are leaving the funeral. And their internal attitude to this situation, to their behavior will immediately change, because they will understand: children have the right to hysterics. But a man will not explain to everyone on the bus. The answer is clear. Don't judge, you don't know all the details.
I spoke with a dozen people who a priori treat you positively. Appreciate. Respect. And I asked them to name your worst qualities. Any comments?
Painfully dependent on the hype, on the noise around her, and for the sake of this she will sacrifice anything, including her own principles
I agree that I am dependent on what you have listed, but I know so well how to create this notorious HYIP that I do not need to make the sacrifices you mentioned. I love being the center of attention and understand how to do it without such compromises.
Because of her specific appearance, she always needs to feel like a femme fatale
Rather, on the contrary, it seems to me that I have always understood that I am not a beauty, and since childhood I have used other mechanisms of conquering people - humor, intellect, self-irony. And what who calls it, I don't know.
She can't be trusted with secrets
Lie. I know how to keep secrets, this is part of my profession as a journalist. If you want to be trusted with secrets, know how to keep them. And among friends, I am, rather, famous for the opposite: I never "flow away".
The next quote: “In childhood or early adolescence, she could follow the path of a child beaten into a corner or tear everyone in a row. I chose to vomit and still does not stop. "
You can see it that way.
She thinks she is allowed more than others
I know it’s not good to think so, but to be completely frank, there’s a little something like that.
“She doesn’t believe a single person to the end, therefore she herself behaves in such a way that she cannot be trusted.”
I rarely trust people. On the one hand, I forgive them, but, on the other, I do not trust them to the end. These are related things.
“She thinks that everyone will forgive her and no matter what she does, she will be able to play the situation back, even if she did the wrong thing.”
I do something not because I think they will forgive me later or not, not based on whether I can act out or not, but because I think something is right or not. Sometimes I am wrong. This also happens.
Good tactician, but bad strategist
I think yes.
Would you approve of a wife like you for Plato?
Yes and no. A smart person can change his life, a stupid one cannot.
You are a good person?
- things aren't going quite according to plan. After all, if everything is clear according to the planned schedule, some kind of collapse can always happen unexpectedly.
- I always like to see the sky above my head. But seriously, I try to build a schedule so that such a need does not appear. In my beloved Audi, I am much more comfortable.